A Safe Love Affair

"You want to fall in love with a shoe, Go Ahead.
A shoe can't love you back,
but,
on the other hand,
a shoe can't hurt you too deeply either.
And there are so many nice-looking shoes." -Allan Sherman

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes." -Jack Handey